You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
Skipping work because i'm still too drunk from last night still. got home at midnight and passed out in front of my door for 2 hours bc i couldn't find my key
had to call my rooommate to let us in. Passed out in my dress and found the key on my hair tie-in my hair- just now.
I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
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