and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Randomize
