That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
