fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
Randomize
