..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
