I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
Randomize
