My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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