oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
