I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
Randomize
