Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
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