Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
Randomize
