god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize
