I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
