around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Randomize
