I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
Last night my friend tried to make out with me in an olive garden. Ahahah
Nothing says 'I love you' like never ending salad and breadsticks
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
I need a hoe opinion
go on
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Randomize
