I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
Randomize
