Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
Randomize
