I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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