I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
Randomize
