So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
Randomize
