As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
Randomize