Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Randomize
