god i wish i could take a shit and a shower at the same time
I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
