Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
Randomize
