If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
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