plz talk dirty to me
you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
my girlfriend just compared my daughters eyes to gollum from lord of the rings.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
Randomize
