xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
me + whiskey = a bad person
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Randomize
