Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
Tomorrow's Mother's Day and the only thing I can afford is beer and the McDonalds dollar menu. Do you think a Budweiser and a Big Mac says thank you for me fucking up your life since 1990?
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
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