you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
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