Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
I think weed is turning my hair brown
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
that is very illegal...i love you.
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