Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
I need you to promise me that the first one to find out our kids smoke weed, takes the weed so we can smoke it ourselves
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
