youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
Randomize
