i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
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