i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
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