More tranny stories later!
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
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