Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
Randomize
