I dreamt Michael Jackson dropped his pants in front of me and I had to ignore it.
Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
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