hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
i used baking grease as lip gloss
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
Randomize
