the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
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