dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
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