He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
Randomize
