I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
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