What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
My math professor just asked us to draw the graph of the derivative of our drunkenness from friday to sunday. Dear Jesus this looks bad.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
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