Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
Randomize
