ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
