I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
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