Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
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