Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
Randomize
