i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Randomize
