new low.... made out with someone while peeing
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
There's a burrito next to my bed. Did you buy it for me or is the Chipotle fairy real? And why am I naked?
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
Randomize
